Do you ever find yourself making imaginary tallies of how much you are doing vs how much your spouse is doing?
Have you noticed how, when you do that, joy and fun are nowhere to be seen in your household?
The simple truth is: when we keep score, joy can’t thrive. That act of score keeping is both the precursor and the food of bitterness. It makes for hostile conditions where joy dies. And that’s not how God designed marriage to work!!
During times where I have felt “Oh! I am doing so much more than him!”, that’s the only thing that occupies my thoughts. It’s almost like there’s nothing he can do to catch up with how much I think I am doing. This is the breeding ground for discontentment. It’s a hole you start digging yourself into and before you know it, it’s become your grave!
Instead, you should love your spouse and serve your spouse and let them fall in love with you. Marriage should never be 50/50 or any other kind of ratio. It should be 100/100 everyday for the rest of your lives. When you focus on loving and serving your spouse, that’s where joy flourishes in your marriage. When you are doing what God has called you to do, when you are walking in the spirit and letting it guide your marriage, joy is a natural by product.
So, please, I beg you, stop keeping score. Love with reckless abandon and let the fruits of joy and peace and kindness overflow in your marriage and in your home. You’re in for so much fun when you do!