Between the Sheets: Why Intimacy Matters in Marriage
The world revolves around sex—literally.
Without it, the human race would quietly fade out in about a hundred years. But sex is more than biology or reproduction. It adds an element of life we crave—connection, desire, and an awakening of emotion that reminds us we’re alive.
(It’s one reason I even host a private Facebook community where I dispel common sex myths—no trench coat, hat, or dark sunglasses required 😉.)
Why Sex Brings Life to Marriage
Have you ever watched a James Bond movie with your husband?
If not, there’s a chance you live in a cave—or might be dead—so let’s assume the answer is yes and move on.
Would any of the 26 James Bond movies be half as intense without the music?
Of course not.
The music builds anticipation, heightens emotion, and adds excitement. Without it, the story falls flat.
A Marriage Without Sex Is Like a Movie Without Music
Let’s try a more feminine comparison.
Imagine The Sound of Music renamed:
A Story of a Large Family Escaping the Nazis… With No Music.
It wouldn’t be a heartwarming story of love and hope—it would feel more like a dry documentary.
Marriage works the same way.
A marriage without intimacy is like a movie without music.
Blah.
Why Sex and Marriage Need Each Other
Marriage and sex go together like coffee and hot.
Who wants lukewarm coffee every morning?
Marriage and sex also need each other like a sunny day needs a breeze. All sun and no breeze becomes scorching. Add the breeze, and suddenly the earth sings.
An exciting, connected sex life doesn’t just make marriage sweeter—it strengthens it.
Sex Protects the Foundation of Marriage
Jennifer Flanders once said:
“Sex does for a marriage what good landscaping does for a house—it adds beauty and protects the foundation.”
Think about landscaping for a moment.
When it’s nurtured and cared for, it blooms season after season. When it’s neglected, weeds grow, ant beds appear, vines overtake everything—and even the foundation of the house can be damaged.
Sex within marriage works the same way.
It needs consistent attention to flourish and to protect the foundation of the relationship.
And consistency is key.
Sex is better when it’s consistent—just like it’s easier to keep a ball rolling than to stop and start it over and over again.
What If You Don’t Love Sex Right Now?
f intimacy with your spouse feels stale—or if your desire has quietly slipped away—decide right now that it doesn’t have to stay that way.
You can grow to love it again.
You can even crave it.
You married each other for a reason. There is something worth nurturing, protecting, and reviving—and intimacy is a powerful place to start.
Supporting Desire Naturally
If your get-up-and-go has gotten up and left, a few supportive tools can help.
Some couples enjoy using essential oil blends like Shutran to help support desire and connection for both husband and wife.
Sometimes a small sensory shift opens the door to renewed intimacy.
A Lighthearted Marriage Moment
The other day, I was pushing my toddler around Walmart in a shopping cart when she suddenly asked—very loudly:
“Mom, do you have superpowers?”
The question caught me completely off guard.
Superpowers? Me?
Before I could answer, she added confidently:
“Dad says you do!”
Ahhh… mystery solved.
I’ll take that compliment any day.
And the funny thing is—I know exactly why he thinks that.
Thank you very much. 😄
Final Thoughts: Don’t Neglect What Matters Most
Sex isn’t everything in a marriage—but it is something.
When it’s nurtured with intention, consistency, and care, it brings warmth, connection, and strength to the relationship.
Just like music in a movie, intimacy brings marriage to life.
And that’s worth tending—between the sheets and beyond.
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